I am horrible blogger but let me catch you up. I once again split open in my chest even with the expanders taken out. I don't know if my skin doesn't do well with stitches or what. Anyway on the May 9th when they took the remainder of my lymp nodes out under my left arm they stitched me back up again. I am not going to lie the lymph nodes hurt pretty bad. I couldn't move my arm and needless to say I didn't have the best nurse when I woke up in recovery. I would ask for meds and she wouldn't even respond. Once I asked for my husband and my mom then she though she would speak to me. She was on the phone with her boyfriend and then her mom. Anyway, the surgery took sometime to get over. My arm is still numb in the back and I freak if anyone touches it. Not the freak where you get mad the freak where someone just zapped you with electricity. I finally went in for physically therapy after a couple weeks to get my arms moving. Unfortunately I didn't see someone who was familiar with breast cancer and believe my left shoulder now has a tear in it after stretching to far. I will go into that more later, like I said there is a lot to catch up on. LOL
I wish I had done this as I was going a long I feel like I am leaving something out or not putting the importance on some parts. I was referred to an oncologist and one of the first things she said was when you come in for chemo....I had no idea. My breast surgeon thought that chemo and radiation wouldn't be needed as the remainder of my lymph nodes came back negative(Thank God) My cells were reproducing faster then they were when they did the original needle biopsy but my breast surgeon thought it still wasn't necessary as my case was brought in front of a conference and 25 doctors had all thought that I wouldn't need it. I took the oncotype DX test. (they take your tumor and 23 of your genes, your age and determine what your reaccurance score is) I had an 9 percent chance of reoccurance according to this test. The breast surgeon referred me to another oncologist per my request. My new doc also spoke of chemo. I couldn't understand and by then had enough and just said "do it" the told me to think on it and I said I had enough of worrying and back and fourth and just to do it. I asked her about the oncotype DX test and she said it was for post menopausal women. They didn't have enough studies on women my age.....same story. I was scheduled to have a port put in on Wednesday. I called my breast surgeon on Tuesday and told her the news. She again waseemed shocked but I am sure didn't want to step on anyones toes. I did ask her why I took this test if it didn't pertain to me. She said that it did, that there was just fewer premenopausal women in the study for obvious reasons because there was fewer of us. We talked for awhile and I decided I wasn't going to do chemo. When I went back to my oncologist she did say it was a lot of toxins and would be satisfied if I had a full hysterectomy with my ovaries out and the hormone blocker pill for 5 years. Fair enough.
I had my full hysterectomy with ovaries out on Aug. 24th. with the da vinci robot. Let me tell you that was the easiest surgery and I was thankful as my body had been through enough. The HOT flashes did start in probably 10 hours after my surgery. I was amazed at how fast they came on. They aren't joking when they say you are slammed into menopause over night. I kept telling myself it was easier then chemo. I was driving 3-4 days later.
I was scheduled to have my expanders put back in on the 17th of Sept. they were going to use alloderm to help my skin and help the expanders stay in. I was so excited to get on with the process of having my boobies back. I hated wearing the fake ones. Summer they were hot and I didn't want to go to the pool or beach with my children. I made the mistake of assuming it would be just like an implant surgery I would be in and out and no big deal. Right before they wheel me in for surgery the doc says most women stay the night. ( I wasn't prepared for that. I had no one to watch my children) When I woke up I was surprised by the pain and had decided to stay the night, actually ended up staying two. The doctor had said there was so much scar tissue they had to be real aggressive to get the expanders in empty. When I got home I was in a lot of pain. I could feel the expanders on my ribs and my sternum and it hurt so bad. I kept telling myself it would get better it would pass. I had learned usually day 3-4 I felt better. This one wasn't going away. It was horrible. I went for a check up and the doc had told me because the expanders were empty they are flat so they are stretched out further plus I had drain tubes AGAIN. I had them after my mastectomy, expander removal, lymp node removal and now again. I hate them. I know they serve a purpose but I hate them!! I always seemed to feel better once they came out. When I went for another follow up after having the drains in for 3 weeks they took them out and were able to give me my first fill. I felt ok in the doc but by the time I got home I was miserable!! It was hard to breath and there was a pulling I can't explain. I was only getting 50 cc's because of all the problems I was having they wanted to go slow. I went the next week for 50 more and I felt sooooooo much better. The expanders were begining to lift off my ribs and sternum and it was a huge relief. My third fill was the same but I was starting to get red skin and a bubble like deal under my skin on my right side at my surgery scar. I came back in the following week to have the doc look at it and he wanted me in surgery the next day. So Nov 1st I had another surgery and you guessed it another drain tube. My lymphatic fluid was building up and was sitting in that pocket and had ate through my own tissue. It created a weak spot in my skin and I had to hold off on my fills until the drain was removed and I healed. This I hated because I still didn't think I was big enough for no fake boobies. I am not petite and 150 cc's looked like nothing on me. I had the drain in for 3 weeks and was still draining more then I should but the doc didn't want me getting an infection from the tubes. I once again started to fill up with fluid at the bottom of my expander and the doc drained 60cc's with a needle. He thought if we started to fill again that maybe it would leave no room for the fluid to stay and would hopefully drain into my body and filter like it was suppose to. I came back in the next week and they gave me double the fill 100 cc's. It was tight and I could fill it more then the otheres. I had noticed something that looked like it was poking me from the inside and under my thin thin skin. The doc said it was the expander that had a fold in it because its not full all the way or enough. He said its like a balloon when its not full there is wrinkles in it. He did say my skin is very thin and wants to add more aloderm (cadaver skin) He would like to do it at the implant exchange but doesn't think we will make it that long and told me as soon as it comes through my skin to call him and we will go in. So now I am just a ticking time bomb waiting to split open AGAIN. He did tell me that if the expander does come through and he need to change it out he will fill me to where I am at now and won't make me start all over.
Phew I think I caught you up. I am sure I left some out. This process has been longer then any of us thought and what ever seems to be able to go wrong has. The good news is I seem to be cancer free. WOHOO!! The rebuilding is just taking so long.
